This is a very unusual post about Chinese New Year. Unusual in the sense that I'm not blogging about all the preparations required to usher in CNY. But rather how I feel about CNY this year.
I've been spending a bit of time in Malaysia for the past 3 weeks or so. With all these extra time, I decided to drive back to my hometown in Kluang, Johor to spend some time with my parents. And since it's near CNY, it's also time to go and help them with spring cleaning.
This year's spring cleaning has been rather unusual. Just before I was due back in Kluang, my mother fell really ill. She had high fever consecutively for 3-4 days that refused to subside. By the time I hear about it, it was the night before I was due back in Kluang. My father had decided to check her into the hospital hoping that the doctors could test her for dengue test. The doctors however didn't, because apparently in order to do the test, the patient has to have fever and malaise for 5 days. I was a bit worried because I feared it could be something worse like meningitis.
Anyway, by the time I reach home, my mother seemed to have regain a bit of her strength. Her fever had subsided somewhat. And as the days passed, she was getting better and on the mend. However, a hacking cough plagued her. And for the life of me, I cannot recall an occasion when I was growing up that my mother coughed this bad. In fact, my mother has never cough at all.
And of course with the cough and the fever that she was recovering from, my mother just couldn't pluck enough energy to do major spring cleaning. My father did most of it, while I helped out as much as I could. This is my realisation that my parents are old.
Then there was a funeral that I had to drive both my mother and grandmother to attend in Segamat. My mother's grandaunt had passed away. Visiting the grandaunt's home was a surreal experience for me - seeing it from both child's and adult eyes and remembering of how the house used to look like compared to present time and the pervasive smell of rubber cup lump from memory. And the numerous grand aunts and uncles that I vaguely remember and seeing that one by one they had aged as well. Accompanying them to this funeral, just nailed it deeper into my consciousness that my parents and grandmother are old.
The final affirmation came when I left Kluang last Saturday to come back to KL to catch up on work and wait for Hubs arrival from Jakarta. When I finally exited the highway to turn off to my own home, I felt this familiar yet strange lump of sadness and feelings of homesick. It caught me by surprise. It has been a long time since I felt this way. The last I remember feeling like this was when I was 18 years old and studying in KL. Everytime my sisters and I had to leave Kluang after a semester break, we always felt homesick and can't help to shed a tear or two that we had to go back to KL for our studies.
And that Saturday night, while browsing and viewing some of the annual, schmaltzy CNY festive commercials that place a lot of emphasis of family unity, filial piety and all the works, I came across this video, posted by one of my friends on Facebook. Its title - A letter from Mom and Dad.
Personally, I thought this was THE best infomercial about cherishing one's parents I've seen for this CNY, although I can't really call this a commercial because it isn't. For me, it is a bittersweet explanation, realisation, come-of-age, the dawn of a new awakening, lightbulb moment (call it what you want) for all the experiences that I've encountered the week before. That my parents ARE old. They are NOT getting old.
CNY is upon us in just 3 more sleeps. I wish you who happen to be reading this a very prosperous year and more importantly, a blessed and blissful family reunion and family time ahead.
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